Yesterday was my mom and stepdad's anniversary. I created a little photo collage for them as a special anniversary card. I like doing stuff like that because it is certainly not something I could have ever gotten in any card shoppe. :)
My parents divorced when I was 6. I really don't remember it - although the story I've been told was that my brothers and I were all sat down and told and I apparently came unglued. What child wouldn't. Two years later my mother met my stepfather, and they've been together ever since. That was 32 years ago. Wow.. 32 years!! I could only WISH to be that lucky!
Their day spent was simple. I called later in the evening because I wanted to surprise them with their "card" before I called. Dave had school stuff to tend to, so I talked with Mom. She told me they shared a snack of apples and peanut butter ( a fave snack of me and my kiddos thanks to Grandma Jean!! ) and he got her a beautiful bouquet of roses. He's always good like that! He always remembers their special days and makes Mom feel really special. I've always admired him for that.
When most kids have a stepparent, life changes in a lot of ways. Mine changed in a LOT of ways because I got two stepparents. Both of my parents remarried. I think its great the way their lives all turned out. I have an amazing family.No bickering between parents - which as a divorced parent I realize is NOT an easy task. I can easily put all my parents in the same room and there be no apparent issue. No drama. No yelling or throwing of fragile items or sharp objects. They are civil. Even at my wedding they were extremly civil. And my stepfather showed the most amazing and classy thing I'd ever seen. Both my father and stepfather gave me away. They have both been major influences and father figures in my life, so there was no way for me to possibly choose one over the other. At the end of the ceremony, when the mother of the bride is escorted out, the father of the bride, in this case her husband, is supposed to walk behind her and the groomsman walking her out. My stepfather didn't do that. My stepmother was then escorted out, and my father walked behind her and the groomsman, and my stepfather walked out next to my dad. Just amazing! And he's always been that way.
When our Dad got relocated from Boston to Atlanta, we were only going to be able to see our father a couple of times a year. My stepfather didn't feel that was right. So he found a job in the south, and we moved to Georgia so we could be closer to our Dad and see him more often. Again, amazing.
He truly saved my mother's life. I'm not sure where we would have been if it hadn't been for him.
I'm sure there are probably parts of my parents divorce I will never know or ever understand. Just as my kids will never understand or know all the nuances of *my* divorce or seperation. But I believe all things happen for a reason. I know divorce is not an easy thing. I know it was very diffcult on my brothers and I, and I know it was tough for my Dad too. And it certainly wasn't easy for either of my stepparents to step into ready made families and try to blend - but somehow we've managed to do it..and do it pretty well I might say!
So a huge thank you to my stepfather for taking on the task of raising 3 kids, for loving our mother with all your heart the way you have for the past 32 years, for putting up with long commutes to work so Mom could have her house in the country, for the many many moves and relocations, and for just everything you did to help us appreciate life and love. And a huge thanks to my Mom for all the trials and tribulations you went thru while we were growing up. Together you two accomplished a lot. Raised three pretty awesome kids ( if I might say so myself ) and are still going strong! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
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